You know, it's funny. I used to HATE the snow. So very much. Now granted, I don't love the mess it makes but boy have I learned to love the snow. While we were playing in the snow today, we wrote Connor's name. I can't help but think of him when it snows. I read something one day that I really loved. "Snowflakes are kisses from our babies". I really like that idea. If that's the case, I was smothered in kisses today... all 3 of us were. Considering I never got kisses from my sweet boy, this is the next best thing. As I was watching our 4 year old play in the snow with red cheeks and snowflakes in her eyelashes, I couldn't help but think about how much fun Connor would have had in the snow with his sister. I would have had to keep him afloat in the snow with as much as we got! It might have swallowed him whole! The snow was beautiful and it was so calm. I love to just watch it fall. I still think of all the "firsts" that we never got to experience. This would have been the first real snowfall that he would have been able to play in. Instead of one tiny set of footprints, I should have been watching two. But, I could feel him there with us today. It just still shocks me sometimes that there are still those moments that creep up on me and I think "what if". And one "what if" spirals into a whole series of them! Things I've thought a billion times... Connor James, mommmy misses you so very much and I know at least some of those snowflakes were kisses. I LOVED every one of them. I love you sweet boy.